Kat's Playbook

Our Little Miss K is already 8 weeks old!  Holy smokes....8 weeks!!!  I know everyone says it, but the time really does fly by.  I look at her and think she is getting to be so big, but then other times I just see how tiny she still is.

You can read the full birth story here.  But here are some of my key take aways from the big day (Yes....8 weeks later):

1.  This was the Honey Badger pregnancy.  At least that is what Gator Guy called it.  As in....I do what I want.   And Honey Badger Don't Give a Shit.  A key example:   I was driving behind a car that I thought was going too slow.  When I finally got the opportunity to pull ahead, I gave her a strong hand gesture (don't worry, not the finger...just more of a back hand to the face move) and said, "Really sucks when you drive slow and are ugly too."  Yikes...I feel a little bad about that one.  But this was a common attitude.  Honey Badger Just Don't Give a Shit.  We enjoyed showing the official Honey Badger video to my mom during labor as she quickly judged her own daughter (knowing that I am just like her!!). 











2.  There is nothing relaxing about labor and delivery.  Anyone who says so is a liar and you should not trust anything else they say.  It is hard, exhausting, and effing hurts!  And yes, I got the Epi too.  And so to cope with this, I listened to the most hard core music available.  Not quite Five Finger Death Punch level, but more along the lines of AC/DC and Metallica.  AC/DC's Hells Bells is the ultimate Get Yo Game Face On song and so I repeatedly listened to that one.  My advice for future mothers...do whatever gets you pumped up.  This is your ultimate work out.  Your life marathon.  So get your game face on.











3.  Throw your plan out the window.  I read all over Pinterest and blogs about birth plans.  I read it last time with Mr. T too.  And the truth is....the doctors know way more than you do.  I know...mind blowing isn't it.  But it is true.  And so if they say you need XY and Z, chances are you do.  Now, don't get me wrong, as a usual "Let Me Talk to the Manager" kind of girl, I know when to ask the right questions and get what I want.  But for the most part, there is a reason they did a crap load of school and you didn't.












4.  Don't bother bringing anything nice.  Again on Pinterest, I see all these fancy gowns, booties, and underwear made just for Mamas that just pushed a child out of their Vajayjay.  Here's my advice...SO NOT WORTH IT.  Unless you just like throwing money in the trash, then go for it.  But did you know that after part of birth is Naaaaasty???  As in you sit on a doggy pee pad to collect all the nastiness during your stay.  Do you want to buy special garments just for that?? Don't even bother using your own clothes or something that you just purchased.  And in fact, I say take the same approach at home for the first couple days.

5.  Feel Put Together.  Ok, I know I just said you should wear scrappy clothes, but that doesn't mean you can't look presentable.  There will be pictures.  And you will want to keep them at some point even though your face may be swollen and you look ginormous.  But getting comments that I looked great just an hour after birth made me think, "Hells yeah!!!" even though I felt like an effing diaster.  My tip: Pick a hair style that works in bed.  I chose the side braid.  And it stayed in pretty good and made such a difference.


6.  Send that baby to the nursery.  This was the number one suggestion with Mr. T and we followed suit.  But this time I hesistated knowing this is our last baby.  I thought she was just too cute and I wanted all the possible cuddle time.  Gator Guy brought me to my senses, and we sent her to the nursery.  And thank goodness.  Because she took one last gasp of fluid on her way out, she needed to have a tube down her throat and rinsed out her stomach.  Holy hell!!!  I am beyond glad that I didn't have to witness that.  And with Mr. T, he had a huge blow out diaper of that black tar mess.  So leave it to the AMAZING nurses to help you out.  PS....always give a big thank you whether it is with cookies, a card or something to the nurses.  They are truly amazing.


7.  Take a breather about Breastfeeding.  Ready...I know moms are going to HATE me and I am very happy that breastfeeding has worked for both Mr. T and Little Miss K.  But you know what...it doesn't always work.  There are many babies in the NICU that don't get breast milk...and they turn out just fine!!Breastfeeding is tough.  And I give MAJOR props to those that do it for a long time.  But just remember, it is OOOKKKKK whatever you do.  Probably a good motto for parenting overall.  Everything is going to be OOOKKKK.

8.  Take EVERYTHING from the hospital.  Ok, maybe not everything...but every little item that is in the room for you.  Diapers, the blue nose squeegee thing, pads for you, hideous underwear for you, tucks, vag spray, etc.  All totally worth it. 

Posted in: Baby #2, Baby Girl, Labor on Wednesday, November 27, 2013 at