A Nack for Picking the Loser

Dear One of the Chris', 
You were my favorite on night one.  Actually, even before that when I stalked the ABC.com website to get a first look at the new 25 h-o-t guys.   And you probably scored points with me because you are the closest of the guys to my dear Gator Guy.  But you didn't even make it past the second week.  You didn't even get any air time.  We never learned whether you moved to Paris, played baseball, are insecure about wearing a speed-o, or if you were "dangerous".  Nadda.  Instead, we were just left with your sweet smile on a night full of Adult Bully D-Bag Drama. 

But Chris, there's even another reason I am more sad that you are gone.  You leaving and not getting a rose means that My Streak is done.  You see...during the first season of the Bach...I chose Trista.  Straight out of the limo, I picked the mousy voiced NBA Dancer. I had even picked Ryan during Trista's season, but let's be honest, I just have to support those Colorado Boys!  And then I picked Brooke, the cute little gal from the south in season 2 with Aaron.

I chose Deanna on the first night with Womack and cheered to keep watching her bluntness even with how cute and down-to-earth Jenni was.  And before "The Mesnick" made an appearance again and again (which is when a grown man buckles down and lets the water works flow while hunched over a balcolny or some sort of ledge), I thought Sleepless in Seattle was the ONE for Ms. D.  

And then just last season, like many of us Bach fans out there, I picked the girl next door in yellow to be the ONE for Jake.  Ali may have not come in with a silver medal, and I didn't pick the runner up each and every season, but I gotta say, the odds are there.  I mean...I should take these odds to Vegas or something.  Or it just means that I have a nack for picking the Loser, and should stay away from all gambling what-so-ever.  But either way, I conclude tonight knowing that I have lost my touch.  Well...at least for this season.   

And so, One of the Chris', your departure makes me oh-so-sad.  So keep on with that sweet smile.  And its just too bad that ABC just had you picked for a filler.  

Dear ABC,
Can I please get sub-titles for Kasey??  For some reason, I cannot understand a  single word that comes out of this guys mouth.  I am just waiting to hear that he has a speech impediment, for which I will then be going to hell for, but until then...Kasey, if you and I crossed paths some day...We would need a translator.  Can you help me out Chris Harrison?



  1. that's why I don't snark on Kasey...I'm just afraid I'll make fun and then find out he's not doing it on purpose and then I'll get the sads and feel like a jerk. :)

  2. There were too many guys named Chris and Craig!

    Sorry your streak was ruined.

    I'm with you on Kasey. I AM hard of hearing so I thought I was the only one that couldn't hear him.

  3. hahaha. loved this letter. WOW, you really can pick them. I'm so into the bachelor as well. Though, I wish I weren't cause I hate the way it has become acceptable to make out with everyone. It must be so torturous for all the contestants.

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